Dad
Dad worked for the Evening Post in Birmingham and was lucky enough to be entrusted with a company van, but for company use only - i.e. work and back plus errands.
After only his first week with the van, he was called into the managers office for a tongue lashing. He was told that he was not allowed to take his girlfriend to work in the van, or pick her up, or use it all weekend (someone grassed him up). He was called into the office again a week later, having not even ignored the manager and told that this would be the final warning.
A week later he was back in the office again. The manager was sweating, red, veins on his neck showing and went absolutely nuts. He ranted for about 2 minutes, having called Dad all the names under the sun, until the office went quiet.
"Well, what have you got to say?" asked the boss.
"Any chance of a piggy-back-ride around your office?", Dad replied.
I think the story made it into the Evening Post, but I'm not sure.
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